Geek Speakin

But none of it matters right now. I'm awesomely happy right now. :)

Yesterday I did something I haven't done since before high school...I went outside, I took off my shoes and played soccer on the football field.

A percussion group from Amsterdam called Eternity is in the US and every time they come to the US our marching band becomes their official ambassador.  While they were practicing with our percussion after practice, their camera man pulled out a soccer ball and started dribbling by himself. While everyone else seemed to be having a blast, he looked rather bored so I snuck up behind him, stole his ball and dribbled away giggling. He chased me and it turned into a game of "capture the ball".

After the group was done practicing, they saw us playing around and begged me to play a game with them. You could tell they took it easy on me because of my injured knee, but we still had a BLAST and they had a heck of a time getting past my defenses. The only way they could was to go through my left side which they tried to avoid after seeing me wince in pain when they did. It felt so good to just take off my shoes and run...I haven't been able to really run since I hurt my knee and now that it's getting better it was so theraputic. By the end of the game (my team won! Whoo!) we were all extra hot and sweaty and tired from band practice and the game. We gave each other hugs afterwards, exchanged some emails and phrases in each other's native language and they drove me to my dorm and dropped me off.

I felt like a kid again, I was all giggly and bouncy after. :) It was great.

...just how much I hate you, you stupid bear.

You ruined my self-esteem, put me down, called me a lying whore and fucked around with my feelings, for what? Just so you could lord yourself over me and get into my pants.

You're a hypocrite. You're a liar. And you, sir are the whore. You slept with my BEST FUCKING FRIEND and had the balls to blame ME for it. Any time you pressured me into doing something then felt guilty for it you blamed me and called me weak. I was MISERABLE and I don't know why I let myself love you.

How am I the whore? You were going to Jekyll Island to fuck some dude while we were still together, and yet I'm the whore for having a Master whom I haven't been able to touch in months? You had sex with the person that was supposed to be my best friend and I'm the whore? I'm sorry, maybe the definition of whore has changed since we last talked.

You fucking hypocrite ass bastard. So, when you're not ready to talk about something, it's okay but when I'm not sure how to say what I need to and take my time in it I have to have everything on my terms? You have no respect for me, my feelings or my comfort and all you can say to me is I only think of myself? You claimed that what I did was a sin and loving my Master or even having a Master was a sin but what about your bisexuality? That's a sin. What about sex before marriage? That's a sin. No matter how you cut it, you're a sinner too you asshole. Who are you to judge me or what I do or who I love? At least I LOVED the people I had sex with, I'm quite sure you never loved me. Oh, yeah...quit blaming me for your inability to keep your penis in your pants.

Speaking of sins, learn your fucking Bible you false-thumper.

You make yourself out to be so much of a better person than I, someone who never lies but you lied to me more than once while we were together and to this day have not admitted your fault even though I've told all there was to tell about me. You intentionally LIED to me, told me you LOVED me and all you wanted was sex. How do I know? Because the instant I wouldn't give it up, you kicked me out and didn't call me until you were horny again. You kissed me, told me you loved and forgave me and when I said that I would rather stay single, kicked me out. Some love, huh?

Don't ever speak to me again. Don't call me, text me, IM me, think about me. Fuck you. Fuck you and her both. Oh wait...you've already done that with each other you adulterer.

When did you last write/receive a handwritten, snail-mail letter? Who was it to/from? 
Submitted by Places Unknown.

My friend Jared went to Argentina shortly after our high school graduation on a mission trip. Natually, he didn't have phone or internet so the only way we could communicate was through snail mail. We sent letters, food, books and other little goodies back and forth for over three years. Now that he's back in the states, I can call him but I still send him a letter or two, just out of habit. :)

How dare you... How DARE you act this way? You ruined EVERYTHING and you're pretending like it never happened?! You sit there and brag about how good your love life is after you tore mine to pieces and you expect me to just come back all happy and shit? I'm going through HELL because you couldn't keep your mouth shut! I'd be less angry if ya know...I had the chance to do this on my own time, when I was ready but NOOOO...you had to go "help" me and rip my heart out.

The bear hates me, I don't deserve my Master or wife.

And what do you have to say for yourself?

"Oh hey, I've got a new mate and he's AWESOME and I LOVE him and blah blah blah". Well you know what?

Fuck your love life. I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear from you until I'm not so angry.

Do me a favor. Never help me again.

Who are the last five people you called on your cell phone?

1. My heart, Dre. <3 I needed some cheering up after getting some bad news.
2. My brother. We're throwing a birthday party for my grandma and I need milk and cookies to make dessert. Mmm...dirtcake. :D
3. My best friend, Blueberry. I had to squeal about the convo me and Dre had. XD He makes me such a girl sometimes.
4. My doctor. Needed a refill on my inhaler.
5. Hoagie. Just wanted to talk. <3

Right now, you have no right to be upset because I talk to the guy you've got a crush on more than you. Why? Well...

1) You stole my mother fucking boyfriend, you slut.
2) He was my friend first.
3) He thinks you're clingy. You want to talk to him every second of every day. He is not with you, he doesn't need to act like it.
4) He knows you're a man-stealing whore.

In conclusion...STFU bitch. ><

My sister is in labor! Yay!!! I'm getting my first nephew!

EDIT: False alarm again. :( He just doesn't want to come out!

What set you apart from the rest of the kids at school? 
Submitted by jks.

The fact that I'd been involved in more extracurricular things than the rest of them had. During my life I went through

-Gymnastics
-Ballet
-Tap
-Karate
-Girl Scouts (Daisy to Senior)
-Choir
-Tae Kwon Do
-Cheerleading
-Basketball
-Soccer
-Softball
....and a few more.

and in 99 I participated in the world champs for Tae Kwon Do and took second in sparring for my weight division. :P

I found you sneaking around my dorm one night, searching for food. It was late and I was coming home from Juice's room, getting ready to fall into a blissful sleep for the night. As I searched for my ID to open the dorm doors, you rubbed against my bare leg, giving me a start.

"Oh! It's a kitty," I say, smiling. "You scared me to death." I reach down slowly to pet you, cautious of a swat or a bite, but you meet my hand and nuzzle against it, purring gently. "Oh, you're so cute."

As I open the door to step in, you walk in with me between my feet. "Nono, kitty...you've got to stay here. I can't keep you inside." You look at me with those big green eyes and meow softly, almost pitifully. You know how to play your cards right.

"...Stay here." I gently place you outside and hurry up to my room. Grabbing a can of tuna, a large bag and a can opener, I go to one of my roommates' rooms. "Rhonda, come help me catch this cat."  Always up for misadventure, my roommate throws on a pair of pants and hurries downstairs with me.

You're still down there, waiting obediently for me to return. Smelling food, you start meowing and rubbing against my leg as I open the can. Setting it in front of you, you began to wolf it down, eating like you haven't eaten in days.

"We have to keep her. We can't leave her alone!" Rhonda says, awing. I nod. We open the bag and ease the tuna inside. You follow it, still eating and not paying attention to your surroundings. We gingerly pick up the bag and ease you past the Hall Director and into the boy's hallway. Once it's safe, we let you peek your head out and glimpse your surroundings. The entire way to my room, you nuzzle my chin, cuddling into me. You're such a friendly, cuddly cat.

We get you to the room and place you safely in my room to explore. While we watch you look around a bit we ponder names.

"What about Hoagie?" my roommate suggests, grinning.

 "No, doof...that's our nickname for you. She'll get confused."

"Hello Kitty!" She exclaims. I giggle and roll my eyes at her. You come and nestle in my lap, curling up to sleep as you are full of food and water. "I know...I'll call her Honey," I say as I scratch between your ears, listening to you purr. "Her belly is the color of Honey and she's the sweetest cat I know."

We were together for 3 short months, Kittyface. I thought I did the right thing in giving you up for adoption because I couldn't keep you. I see now that I should have tried harder to convince my parents otherwise. Two days after you got to your new home you ran away. I pray that you turn up soon, love. Mommy misses you so much and if I ever find you again, I swear I'll never let you go. I knew it from the moment you rubbed against my leg even though there were others out there. I knew from the moment you immediately captured my heart. You are MY kitty. My adorable little baby and I miss you so much. Not a day goes by I don't think of you, or cry because I don't know where you are. Please find a safe place.

Honey

I've neglected this journall, largely because...well, it brings back memories. Either way, I'm putting the past behind me and accepting what I can't change and moving on.

Yes, a large part of the whole thing was my pride but that's me and I cannot change that. It's one of the few things I have going for me.

Moving on. :)

I've got the greatest job on the planet (in my opinion) and I'm vastly in love with it. I work for Camp Hope run by the YMCA here. It's a summer day camp for financially disadvantaged kids. We take them on field trips to the zoo, museum and skating, ect and we have lots of crafts and other stuff to do inside the classroom. I love it, personally and the kids seem to enjoy it too. I'm one of three couselours and I have a class of 10 wonderful kids that are really looking up to us for guidance that their parents can't/don't provide. I feel like I'm really giving back to the community. :D I have a blast just being a kid with the kids, even though I have to be firm with them at times.  It's a pilot program for the YMCA AND the City of Charleston, so there's a lot of pressure for us to succeed. If we do, the camp will be implemented nationwide, which will be awesome. And we get to meet a lot of the "big wigs" here in SC.

SO, basically I'm getting paid 8.50/hr to play with kids and hobnob with the influential people here. Fuck yeah.

And I get paid for training too. So that 5 hour  CPR/first aid training? Yessir. The "meetings" which are really us sitting around, eating pizza and laughing? Yeaaaaah buddy! :D

I love my job. ^^